Chapter 9: Dainty Pinky Wave

This chapter covers a whopping 36 seconds of Face/Off between a secretly recorded therapy session between Phoenix and his psychiatrist, Dr. Libari. Let's get this conspiracy train on the tracks. #faceofftruth #archerdidit

Chapter 8: Command O: Case Closed

The FBI needs some serious organizational help. This chapter also covers the Kennedy magic bullet that managed to hit Sean Archer and his son both in their chests despite anything logic and physics tell us. Welcome back to the movie: the so-not-hot Sinclaire.

Chapter 7: Gay Conversion Camp

Despite the pleas to stop doing this show... this chapter covers Travolta going home to argue with his terrible family, Travolta going to work to be terrible to his coworkers and that's about it.

Chapter 6: Time-Bending Witch

This chapter covers the mysterious backstory of the Troy brothers, the hangar shootout and the death of Castor Troy which makes Travolta cry? It looks like he's sad as hell over it.

Chapter 5: Weekend At Bernie's Scenario

We are gathered here today to mourn the loss of the greatest tongue-sucker in a generation. She is gone but not really because Travolta's partner is keeping her around in a classic Weekend At Bernie's scenario. Or not. It's not clear yet. Do we finally meet the famed Sean Archer in the episode???

Chapter 4: Low-Rent Captain America

This episode covers a whopping 1 minute and 22 seconds of the movie Face/Off in which we cover a jeep playing chicken with a jet. The movie also attempts to give a real name to Tongue-Sucker Jones as if we would accept that. LONG LIVE TONGUE-SUCKER JONES!

Chapter 3: Fruit Eating Stamina

This chapter covers the confusing FBI labeling of their phones, the run-down Southern California International Airport, Castor and Pollux Troy's outfits and the best character so far: Tongue-Sucker Jones. Butt.

Chapter 2: Sinclaire Isn't That Hot

This chapter covers Travolta's suicide contemplation, verbal abuse of his co-workers, Cage working with electronics and how he's into Sinclaire instead of me. But this isn't about me. It's about Face/Off.

Chapter 1: A Murder Of Horses

Face/Off was the subject of the first episode from Loitering In Wonderland Studios so it seemed only logical to write an entire novelization on the film and release it as a podcast and video series. Maybe I need to look up logical in the dictionary. In this first chapter Phoenix West covers the first 3 minutes or so of the best movie ever: Face/Off from 1997. Learn why the show is titled NyQuil & Cocaine.